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Quote of the day: The more common report is that Remus con
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Twelve Emperors by Suetonius

Tiberius Chapter 60: Further cruelties.
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A few days after he reached Capreae and was by himself, a fisherman appeared unexpectedly and offered him a huge mullet; whereupon in his alarm that the man had clambered up to him from the back of the island over rough and pathless rocks, he had the poor fellow's face scrubbed with the fish. And because in the midst of his torture the man thanked his stars that he had not given the emperor an enormous crab hat he had caught, Tiberius had his face torn with the crab also. He punished a soldier Praetorian Guard with death for having stolen a peacock from his preserves. When the litter in which he was making a trip was stopped by brambles, he had the man who went ahead to clear the way, a centurion of the first cohorts, stretched out on the ground and flogged half to death.

Event: Vices of Tiberius